by Linda Rex
I was mulling over the Christmas tradition of gift giving and a question came to my mind as to the difference between getting a gift and receiving a gift. Are these two acts the same? Are these expressions synonymous?
It seems that the whole Santa tradition here in America has become more and more a commercial enterprise rather than the fairy tale it started out as. When I hear people talk about Christmas for their kids I hear a lot of anxiety about being able to get the presents their children want and whether or not they will be in hock for months on end because of what they spent on those presents. Some people who are not financially savvy will spend their rent money or bill money on presents for their kids just because they want them to have Christmas (Nevermind that their electricity is turned off for the next three months of winter!).
As a child sits on the mall Santa’s knees the jolly fellow in red and white will ask him or her what the child wants for Christmas. If the child is not too shy, he will receive a litany of hopeful expectations of presents. Whether or not the child will receive those presents, unfortunately (Santa unbeliever that I am) will depend pretty much on the parents’ budget and the thoughtfulness of grandparents and others. The child really doesn’t have a whole lot of control over what is going to show up in his stocking or under the Christmas tree.
Sometimes I think the whole process would be a lot healthier and happier if children and adults alike not only understood the nativity and the gift of the Christ child, but also understood that there is a difference between getting what we want and receiving what is given.
In getting what we want, we are an essential part of the process. We get to decide what we want. We get to decide what’s important to us and what matters most to us. We get to make a list of all the things we think are essential to our life and happiness.
In receiving, we really are not a part of the process at all except in that we reach out and receive what is given. We don’t really have a say in what we receive—we just receive it and make it ours. It becomes essential to us when we receive it in gratitude and put it to use.
In M. Craig Barnes book “Sacred Thirst”, the author tells about the Asian custom of gift giving and receiving that is always done with two hands. He explains that there is a moment in this act of giving when both the giver and the receiver share the gift. He draws upon this image as he reminds us of “the two hands of God”, the incarnate Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. In giving us Jesus and the Holy Spirit, God gives us himself. All we are asked to do is to receive with open hands the gift that was and is given.
To receive God through Jesus and in the Spirit means that we need to come with empty hands. We need to shred our Christmas wish list of expectations and receive what God has given with humble thankfulness for God’s grace and generosity. We need to give up our insistence that what’s in the stocking and under the tree is what we think we need to have for our life and happiness. We need to stop eating from the tree of good and evil and start eating from the tree of life.
This is another reason it is a good idea to teach children the story of the coming of God in human flesh in the person of baby Jesus. Santa can also be a fun story to tell, but personally I chose instead to tell the story of Kris Kringle who was generous in heart and gave to the poor children who had nothing and were grateful to receive whatever he gave.
This is a picture of you and me, the spiritually poor and needy, longing to have the deep needs of our heart and soul, as well as our body, fulfilled. We come to God with open hands and hungry souls and he generously gives us all we need for life and godliness.
It also teaches us to reach out to others with all God has given us and to freely fill their empty hands with his love and grace, and whatever other needs we may see. When we toss aside all our preconceptions of what God is doing and will do, and receive full what he is offering—himself in Christ through the Spirit in intimate relationship, moment by moment—we will never be the same. Because we will be living out Christmas all year round.
God has given us himself in Jesus Christ in his life, death, resurrection and ascension, and continues even now to pour himself out to us in the Holy Spirit. We can live as though none of this is true and continue to work to get the things we want and think we need all on our own—trying to fill the thirst of our soul in our own way. Or we can let go of all our expectations and receive the gift God has given—new life in Christ through the Spirit.
May your New Year be full of God’s love, truth and grace!
Thank you, Father, for the beautiful and generous gift you have given us of yourself in Jesus Christ and in the Holy Spirit. Grant us the grace to let go of all the expectations and desires that consume our attention and to receive with open, empty hands your perfect gift. Throughout this new year and into the future, pour into us your new life, hope, joy, and peace. You are all we need. Amen.
“After coming into the house they saw the Child with Mary His mother; and they fell to the ground and worshiped Him. Then, opening their treasures, they presented to Him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh.” Matthew 2:11 NASB