patience
When It All Melts Away
By Linda Rex
December 10, 2023, 2nd Sunday | Advent—One of the small things we like to do during Advent at our house is post a wish list on the refrigerator for each member of our household. We find this to be quite helpful in picking out stocking stuffers and other little gifts for one another. This practice helps those of us who aren’t good gift givers to be attentive to one another’s desires and interests.
This morning I was reading in our New Testament passage for this Sunday, 2 Peter 3:8–15a, about a deep desire of God’s heart. This desire is much deeper and much more costly than any stocking stuffer we may imagine. Indeed, the Triune God has already gone to great extremes to enable this wish to come true if at all possible. The apostle Peter tells us that God’s desire is that no one perish, but for all to come to repentance. In the end, there may be some who refuse to come to repentance, but God’s desire is still that every person does. Peter says that for this reason, our Lord Jesus has delayed his return in glory—it is God’s great patience and longsuffering that is our salvation.
In this letter, the apostle Peter was encouraging the believers to hold fast their faith in Christ in the face of false teachers and damaging heresies. He was reminding them of all that was theirs in Jesus, of the grace and love of God, and that there was coming, in God’s good time, a judgment in which our Lord and Savior would return in glory and make everything right. The heavens and earth will melt away one day, he said, revealing the hidden glory of the new heavens and new earth.
The day of the Lord or parousia, in the context of Peter’s second letter, is when Jesus returns in glory to establish the new heavens and new earth. Because it will come “like a thief”, it will come unexpectedly. Peter says this is important to remember because as we live our lives day by day, we want to be attentive to what God is up to—patiently working to bring about the salvation of many people. If this is what God is up to, then we want to be living in such a way that we are full participants in what God is doing, and in this way, anticipating and “hastening” the return of Christ.
One way we do this is by being diligent to be found by our Lord in peace, spotless and blameless as members of the Body of Christ. The source of our peace, our spotlessness, and blamelessness, is not in ourselves or our efforts, but in Jesus alone, as we trust in him as the one who is the Prince of Peace, the spotless Lamb of God, who took all blame upon himself, so that we might be found without blame when brought to judgment. Our diligence then, has to do with our trust in the Lord Jesus Christ, our dependency upon his finished work, and looking to him to finish what he has begun in us. We are diligent to live in the truth of who we are as God’s adopted children, in loving union and communion with Father, Son, and Spirit and each other.
When we consider the new heavens and earth, as Peter calls it, we are told it will be a place where righteousness dwells. Righteousness, or right relationships with God and one another as I like to put it, will be the hallmark of our existence then. So, as citizens of that kingdom even now, the Body of Christ is called to reflect even now the righteousness Christ forged for us on the cross. In Jesus’ death and resurrection, we find the old self melted away and replaced by the new—in Christ we are new creations. Peter tells us to live in this reality even now, resisting the temptation to fall into old patterns or ways of living that are dead and gone.
Just as one day, this temporal existence will melt away and our new existence which is hidden with Christ in God will be revealed, we look forward to when this earth and the heavens will melt away and God’s new heavens and new earth will be revealed. Meanwhile, we live in this broken, sin-wracked world and in our broken, sin-wracked flesh, trusting in our Lord and Savior’s redeeming grace and love. We diligently seek to be who God has declared us to be, living in peace, spotless and blameless, grateful for the longsuffering patience of our God, which is our salvation.
Father, Son, Spirit, thank you for giving us a hope—a new heavens and new earth to look forward to in anticipation, and a new life forever with you. Grant us the grace to live even now in right relationship with you and one another, in your perfect peace, spotless and blameless, as we trust in your salvation, through Jesus our Lord and by your Spirit. Amen.
“But do not let this one fact escape your notice, beloved, that with the Lord one day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years like one day. The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but bis patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance. But the day of the Lord will come like a thief, in which the heavens will pass away with a roar and the elements will be destroyed with intense heat, and the earth and its works will be burned up. Since all these things are to be destroyed in this way, what sort of people ought you to be in holy conduct and godliness, looking for and hastening the coming of the day of God, because of which the heavens will be destroyed by burning, and the elements will melt with intense heat! But according to His promise we are looking for new heavens and a new earth, in which righteousness dwells. Therefore, beloved, since you look for these things, be diligent to be found by Him in peace, spotless and blameless, and regard the patience of our Lord as salvation; …” 2 Peter 3:8–15a NASB
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The Inward Movement Toward Rest
by Linda Rex
Yesterday I tried to reach someone at business by phone, but was put on hold. I waited and waited for someone to take me off of hold and to answer what I thought was an important question, but they took a very long time to respond. As I tried to wait patiently, I listened reluctantly to the voice on the line telling me all the positive attributes of the organization and why I should be doing business with them rather than with someone else.
There were a lot of good things said by the recording I was hearing, but after waiting on the line for quite literally an hour, all I really heard was their indifference to their customers. In fact, every couple minutes they would remind me someone would be with me “shortly”. I remarked to my daughter, who was tempering my impatience with reminders to be calm, that apparently their definition of “shortly” was a lot different than my definition of “shortly”.
After another phone call put in a little later during which I was hung up on and then called back and apologized to, I finally got the answer I needed. And I didn’t even think to mention my concern about their definition of “shortly”. I was just happy to have my concerns taken care of.
However, today when I got put on hold with another company, after about 10 minutes of waiting for tech support, I was beginning to wonder about what the word “momentarily” was supposed to mean. The recording told me someone would be with me “momentarily”. I thought “momentarily” meant in just a moment something would happen. I’m beginning to see that I might need to adjust my use of the English language to fit a culture where time has become very relative for some people.
But then again, maybe the problem isn’t with them, but rather with my inner need to have what I want done, done right now and at my convenience rather than theirs. Maybe what needs to change is my view of time and what is really most important in each moment. For me it is the task at hand. But for God, I’m beginning to believe it is instead the relationship I am encountering in that moment.
When I slow down enough to create space in a circumstance for Christ to enter in by the Spirit, I find the capacity to be patient when I have no reason to be patient, and to be gracious when I have every reason to be frustrated and angry. I’ve noticed lately I need to pay closer attention to my response to the situation in which I find myself, and to detach enough I am no longer reacting but am being proactive instead.
I first learned about dealing with inter-relational issues proactively when my children were little and they knew just how to push my buttons. I learned the time to deal with a problem behavior was not after it had occurred and my temper was hot, but before it ever occurred.
Being proactive meant I set a healthy, safe boundary and let them know ahead of time what it was, why it was in place and what the consequence would be for choosing to violate it. And when they pushed the boundary, the consequence was immediate though compassionate and gracious. In this way they could not blame anyone but themselves for having brought the unpleasant result upon themselves by their behavior.
Handling such issues in that order saved all of us from a lot of anger, yelling, and other unhealthy ways of dealing with the problem. And the result was healthier and more pleasant relationships, I believe, and a greater sense of security in my children. They didn’t have to guess at how I was going to respond, nor could they manipulate me into responding the way they wanted me to in order to get their way.
And a lot of times it only took one or two times standing my ground on important issues in this way, and it ceased to be an issue. They just needed to know what it meant to be a part of the family with regards to that particular issue, whatever it was—honoring bedtime rules and being honest and caring with others, for example.
Now at this late juncture in my life I am learning I need to treat myself in the same way—proactively rather than reactively. It works so much better when I plan ahead of time what my response is going to be in a difficult situation instead of allowing it to cause me to be upset, frustrated and angry.
When I make a phone call expecting to be answered immediately, I am put out when I have to sit on hold for an hour before getting the information I need. I could have hung up and called back, but I still would have been on hold. The issue isn’t with the phone call, but with my expectations and my response—I am reacting to the situation, not proactively following the way of love. I am allowing the circumstance, the person on the other line, the poor customer service, to define me and how I am going to respond.
But what really defines me is not that phone call. Nor is it the person who answers or doesn’t answer. What defines me is the Who in whose image I was made. It is the love of God in Christ which I am filled with, led by, and surrounded by. I, and every other person, am made in the image of God Who is love, and Who created us to love and be loved.
So proactively, I respond to this irritating life situation with the love of God in Christ—making space for Jesus to rest between me and the other person I am interacting with. If I just react instead, there is an immediate response directly to the person and to the situation, which leaves very little room for the Spirit to work. God is a whole lot more concerned about us loving him and loving others than he is about us getting our way in one particular instance in our lives. So we need to proactively create space for the Spirit, to allow the Spirit to go to work in every situation.
My daughter and I were talking about the phone call yesterday, and I was reminded again that stress is never the issue—stress does and will happen. It is our response to the stress which happens in our lives which can be the issue rather than the stress itself. Do we make space for God to work? Do we rest in him and seek to build the relationships of love in our lives, or are we merely focused on the task at hand?
How we respond to and deal with stress impacts our mental, emotional and physical health, as well as our spiritual health. I can see I have a new way to put what I have learned into practice in my relationships with God and others by proactively living in love with those who can be and are irritating, thoughtless or indifferent.
I will face challenges to my self-control and my patience and peace of mind, just as everyone else does. But Christ has already provided what is needed in these situations and he lives in you and me by his Spirit. As we invite him into these situations, and slow down in the moment and realize what is most important to him—living in love—we will find the capacity to create space for the Spirit and the ability to be patient, gracious and understanding instead of frustrated, irritated and angry. It is the work he is doing in us and in our lives, and by making room for him to work, we participate with him in the process.
Lord, thank you for your faithful love and grace, and for living in love in us, with us and for us. May we open space up in all our relationships and encounters in daily life for you to do your perfect work, so we may all grow up into the fullness of Christ. In your Name we pray. Amen.
“Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma.” Ephesians 5:1–2
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