openness

Stop Hiding and Start Finding

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Amazed by His Grace by Linda Rex May 17, 2002--resized
by Linda Rex

This morning I was thinking about how when they were little my children loved to play the game of hide-and-seek in the dark. Although they loved to play outside, some of the best fun we had as a family was playing hide-and-seek in the dark in our old two story house with all its closets and hidey-holes.

It was always a challenge to try to find a place to hide where you could not be found. So often we reverted to subterfuge to confuse whoever was looking so that they would not think to look where we were hiding. They wouldn’t think to look under the clothes in the closet—so that’s where we would hide. They wouldn’t think to look in the bathtub, so that’s where we hid, and we’d sneak out at the end so they wouldn’t know where we successfully hid and find us the next time.

It seems that in the game of hide-and-seek, it was always a problem to get someone to be “it,” to be the finder. We all loved to hide, but who wanted to do the finding, especially when someone might jump out of a dark corner and scare us half to death?

I think in many ways this game of hide-and-seek has translated into adulthood in the context of our relationships. In our complex society today, I believe too many of us are busy hiding—behind our jobs, our weight, our addictions, our toys, and many other things—and very few of us are doing the looking. Building relationships that are deep and lasting is fast becoming a lost art in the midst of our technology-driven culture.

It is no wonder that marriage has lost its appeal to so many people. Marriage requires intimate knowing, transparency and vulnerability—all which are very difficult to do when a person is trying to hide. It necessitates both parties being willing to be “it” all the time and that takes effort, time, commitment, humility and grace.

As I think about this I’m reminded of the God who created all things and placed within us the heart that loves the game of hide-and-seek. He plays “it” all the time and doesn’t seem to mind. In fact, he came himself as the Word into our time and space to live among us. He found us, experienced our human existence and opened us up to life with him. In Christ he comes out of hiding and lets us find him. And he invites us into a transparent relationship with himself where each of us is fully known and loved. He flips the light on and calls us to come out of hiding and be fully exposed.

But coming out of hiding, being authentic and real with each other and with God is a scary business. That’s why God gives us grace. He invites us to trust in his love for us—that he won’t jump out of a dark corner and shout “Boo!” He invites us to live openly with him—moment by moment in real relationship with him. He calls us to be real, to truly be who he created us to be, without any fear that he’s going to sneak up behind us and frighten us.

And God calls us to live in community with one another in the same way. He brings us together in the unity of the Holy Spirit in love relationships where each person is able to be authentic and transparent, without fear of rejection, criticism or betrayal. In a relationship or spiritual community where the Holy Spirit is actively working, each person is not trying to control, manipulate, use or abuse the other. There is mutual submission, humility, service, cooperation and respect instead.

But this all takes effort. And it requires a commitment to stop hiding and to be willing to play “it” for a while—or to a least allow Jesus to be “it” in our place. To know and be known is essential to our humanity—it’s what we’re created for. We need to have relationships with God and with each other that are healthy, transparent and committed.

Jesus said that true life, life that is everlasting, is life in relationship—knowing and being known. He has included us in his relationship with the Father in the Holy Spirit. And he has bound us together with one another in his humanity, serving as the divine Mediator between each of us, and between us and God. There is a Home Base, or shall I say, a Person, where we are fully known and fully loved and even our best efforts at hiding are futile. Maybe it’s time to call the game over, flip on the lights and have a group hug. “All outs, all in free!”

I’m so thankful, God, that you know us completely, inside and out, and still love and care for us. You have revealed yourself to us in Jesus and you do not hide yourself from us, except in those ways that are appropriate to your divine glory. Thank you for including us in your eternal love relationship of the Father with the Son in the Spirit. Grant us the grace to truly love one another the way you have loved and made yourself known to us in Jesus. In his name, we pray. Amen.

“This is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent.” John 17:3

“O righteous Father, although the world has not known You, yet I have known You; and these have known that You sent Me; and I have made Your name known to them, and will make it known, so that the love with which You loved Me may be in them, and I in them.” John 17:25–26

“Then Jesus cried out in the temple, teaching and saying, ‘You both know Me and know where I am from; and I have not come of Myself, but He who sent Me is true, whom you do not know. I know Him, because I am from Him, and He sent Me.’” John 7:28–29

God Up Close

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By Linda Rex

Do you ever wonder just what to believe?

Sometimes there are so many sides to a story, I begin to think that someone is just making it all up. It’s hard to narrow it down to what actually begins to resemble truth. It’s really hard to get to the bottom of it all.

Whether or not I am able to come to some sort of conclusion is often dependent upon who is giving me the information. Is he or she trustworthy? Can I believe what they are saying? Are they reliable? Dependable? Can I trust that they are telling me the truth?

If I trust someone enough to believe that what they are saying is the truth, I will act upon that knowledge. What happens next is very much dependent upon whether or not he or she was telling me the truth. And whether or not my relationship with this person continues to be meaningful and deep depends upon whether or not they were telling me the truth.

I think most people can agree that trust is at the heart of and essential to any meaningful relationship. Trust is something that can be broken and lost. On the other hand, it can be built over time as two people spend time together and come to know each other intimately through shared experiences.

In the series Star Trek—Enterprise episode “Babel One’, we find that two warring nations who are working to establish a treaty intend to meet together at a place called Babel. The Enterprise is escorting the Tellurite ambassador and his party to Babel when they receive a distress call from Shran, an Andorian whose ship has apparently been attacked and destroyed by a Tellurite vessel.

Shran has over time, come to understand and respect the Starfleet captain Jonathan Archer through several shared experiences in which each assisted the other in spite of their mistrust of one another. But now, with both the Andorians and Tellurites on the starship, the rancor between the opposing groups comes to a head. The deep question that lies between every one of these people and a solution to the problem is, “Just who can I trust?”

Isn’t that really what is fundamental to life and to any relationship? Trust. Who is there that I can really count on when things get tough? Who can I believe? Who’ll be there every time in every situation when I need them there? Who’s the one with the answers that are reliable and dependable in every circumstance?

And just like in this story, it is often not immediately apparent just who is telling the truth. The Andorians believe the Tellurites attacked and destroyed their vessel, killing over 70 of their people. The Tellurites believe the Andorians have been attacking and destroying their vessels for years. What neither party is aware of at that moment is that there is a third party imitating, attacking and preying upon both nation’s starships. Finding out this truth is essential to the establishment of trust—of a basis for a meaningful relationship between the two nations.

In other words, it is essential for the development of a healthy relationship and the fostering of good will between the two parties that they begin to get up close and personal. There needs to be a transparency—a revealing to one another the deep secrets of the soul which they prefer to keep hidden. There needs to be an opening up, a vulnerability—which could very well open them up to attack or betrayal. And there needs to be a realization that sometimes it’s not about one or the other, but often something else entirely that is causing mistrust in the relationship.

When we read the story of God “testing” Abraham, we find that God is wanting to learn something about him that he could not find out just by talking with him. God wanted to know whether or not Abraham trusted him completely, and whether or not he truly loved God, down to the core of his being.

It is instructive that when God called to Abraham, he did not run and hide, make excuses or try to rationalize away God’s instruction to offer his son as a sacrifice. He said “Here I am” and he went and did exactly what he was told to do. He trusted God that in spite of what he saw and heard, in spite of the circumstances, God was going to keep his word and work out whatever needed to be done so that Isaac and his descendants would inherit God’s promises.

When we know God well, and over time have built a relationship of trust with him through shared circumstances and going through tough times together, we are happy to do whatever God’s will may be for us at the moment. Although God doesn’t ask people to sacrifice their children today, he does often ask us to sacrifice things we think are important—popularity, prosperity, giving in to our passions and desires, favorite unhealthy habits and improper ways of relating to others. Whether or not we do as God asks is dependent upon whether or not we trust him completely, fully, to the nth degree.

We grow in faith, in trust, over time as we walk with God through the circumstances of our lives. As time goes by, we see that God is faithful, compassionate, longsuffering and truthful. We find that he is completely dependable.

And we learn to trust God as we look at his Son, Jesus Christ. We get to know God’s story, the story of his Son and how he lived, died and rose again, and how he now intercedes for us moment by moment in the presence of the Father in the Spirit. In Jesus Christ, we see God up close. We see God’s nature, character, heart and mind. We get to know God for who he really is—a trustworthy Person Who we can believe and count on.

So when we are faced with that age-old question, “Just who can I trust?” we have a place to start. In our relationship with God in Christ through the Spirit we have a basis for trust. We have shared experiences which teach us God is trustworthy. We have God making himself fully vulnerable to the place where Jesus was willing to suffer and die at the hands of the ones who he came to love and make himself known to. We have a trustworthy God—will we trust him and place ourselves fully into his care, believing his word and doing whatever he asks in every situation? Will we believe?

Trustworthy Father, today I trust you to keep your word to me, to be faithful and loving and compassionate in every situation, and to finish what you have begun in my life and in my heart and mind in Christ. May I always reflect your perichoretic faithfulness and trustworthiness in everything I say and do. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

“Now it came about after these things, that God tested Abraham, and said to him, ‘Abraham!’ And he said, ‘Here I am.’” Ge 22:1
“By faith Abraham, when he was tested, offered up Isaac, and he who had received the promises was offering up his only begotten son; it was he to whom it was said, ‘in Isaac your descendants shall be called.’ He considered that God is able to raise people even from the dead, from which he also received him back as a type.”’ Heb 11:17–19