weeping

Owning Our Stuff

Posted on

By Linda Rex

Yesterday, as the sun peeked out occasionally from storm clouds and a cool breeze kept us wishing for a jacket, we sat outside the church and talked. Good News Fellowship was stepping out of our comfort zone and had invited the community to stop by for the administration of ashes on Ash Wednesday.

Although no one from the community joined us for this event, or for the Community Ash Wednesday service which followed, it was still a good opportunity for us to reflect on the reality of what Christ has done and is doing in our lives.

As a denomination, in the past we have not celebrated this particular day or tradition. But our pastoral team felt it was an opportunity for us to open our doors and begin to step outside of them, offering others an opportunity to share with us the good news of what God has done and is doing in our lives.

As I studied the common practices for the observation of Ash Wednesday, I was struck by the focus on our humanity—“from dust you came, and to dust you will return”—and by the emphasis on repentance and penitence. As we move into the Lenten season, a season of fasting, prayer and repentance, Ash Wednesday provides a good marker and way of getting us focused on and looking forward to the events of Holy Week and the resurrection of Jesus.

It is a good thing to be reminded we are made from dust and will return to dust. There is a sense of humility which comes from realizing apart from the grace of God, we would have no existence at all. In fact, we only exist because of the love and grace of a God who determined before time began we would share in his glory.

I was reminded, though, that any thought of repentance or penitence needs to be kept within the reality of who God is, who Christ is, and who we are in him. We begin not by gazing at ourselves, our faults and failures, but first at the God who created us and made us his own. This God isn’t focused on our limitations or our weaknesses, but on the relationships he created us for, and on the love he has for us.

One of the lectionary readings for Ash Wednesday this year was Joel 2:1–2, 12–17. These particular verses leapt out at me: “Yet even now,” declares the Lord, ‘Return to Me with all your heart, and with fasting, weeping and mourning; and rend your heart and not your garments.’ Now return to the Lord your God, for He is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, abounding in lovingkindness and relenting of evil.” (Joel 2:12–13 NASB) The prophet Joel placed the call to repentance within the framework of who God is, just as God had described himself to Moses so many centuries before, a God who is compassionate, gracious and slow to anger, abounding in lovingkindness and truth (Exodus 34:6-7).

God indeed wants us to own our stuff, to face up to the truth of how we fall short as human beings. But he more importantly, wants us to face up to the truth of who he is—the kind of God who is loving and forgiving, not cruel, condemning and rejecting. In giving us his Son Jesus Christ, God didn’t push us away in our brokenness, but rather brought us close, joining with us in our sin and shame, washing it away, and drawing us into deeper relationship with himself.

In fact, one of the first things which occurred in Jesus’ life after his baptism, when he heard the words of blessing from his Father “this is my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased”, was being, in effect, “cast out” into the wilderness by the Holy Spirit to be tempted of the devil. This forty days of fasting and testing, this penitence, was done on our behalf, for our sake. Jesus took the road of repentance we need to take, where we own our stuff and we choose to turn to God in faith rather than make our own way to glory.

As we enter this season of penitence, this Lenten season of reflection on our need for deliverance and salvation, I feel it is essential we begin with the reality of God’s love and mercy rather than just ending with it. Start with owning what is ours—the gift of forgiveness, and love which comes from the heart of our loving Father—as well as his Spirit who works in us our transformation and healing. And in the light of that, we look at our fallenness and need for grace.

When we keep these things in that order, then repentance is not a move toward despair and despondency, but rather a move toward joyful gratitude. We are compelled to say, “Thank you, Lord, for your mercy.” This is why I could not bring myself just to tell people as I administered the ashes “You came from dust and you will return to dust.” For me, it seemed to leave them in the dust in despair—that doesn’t seem to be what God had in mind. Why else would we have Christ at all?

To me repentance is an essential part of our walk as followers of Jesus Christ. We confess our fallenness, our brokenness, our ungodly ways of living and being. But we do it all in the context of the forgiveness which is already ours and available to us in Jesus Christ. We act as if we are forgiven and act as if we are healed. This is why I felt compelled to use these words in the administration of the ashes this year, “You came from dust, and you will return to dust. So thank the Lord Jesus for joining you in your dust and lifting you up to glory.”

Perhaps I will see things differently in the future—God is always working to heal, transform and renew. But in owning our stuff, I believe we not only need to own our fallen and broken ways of living and being, but also the heart of our loving Father who in Christ and by his Spirit says to us, “You are my beloved child in whom I am well pleased.” Owning our stuff means owning the reality we are forgiven, accepted and cherished by the God who calls us his own, and living and acting as though it were true.

Thank you, Heavenly Father, for the great love which compelled you to not only create us out of the dust of the earth and to breathe your life into us, but to also send your Son to join us in our humanity and to raise us up to live with you in the Spirit. Grant us the grace of true repentance and faith, through Jesus our Lord. Amen.

Psalm 32
A psalm of David.
Oh, what joy for those whose disobedience is forgiven, whose sin is put out of sight! Yes, what joy for those whose record the LORD has cleared of guilt, whose lives are lived in complete honesty!

When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long. Day and night your hand of discipline was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water in the summer heat.

Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt. I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.” And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone.

Therefore, let all the godly pray to you while there is still time, that they may not drown in the floodwaters of judgment. For you are my hiding place; you protect me from trouble. You surround me with songs of victory.

The LORD says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you. Do not be like a senseless horse or mule that needs a bit and bridle to keep it under control.”

Many sorrows come to the wicked, but unfailing love surrounds those who trust the LORD. So rejoice in the LORD and be glad, all you who obey him! Shout for joy, all you whose hearts are pure!” (NLT)

Emotional Overload

Posted on

cross

by Linda Rex

Years ago it was hard for me to imagine seeing Jesus in a tender moment with his Father, so overwhelmed by emotion he begins weeping and crying. I’m not sure if back then I was imagining Jesus with a halo, or Jesus with a stern look on his face. I’m just not really sure.

Yes, I could picture him hanging on the cross with that nasty crown of thorns causing dribbles of blood down his face. But back then, I did not see him with my mind’s eye as being someone who was just as real as me, with the same capacity to be overwhelmed by emotion and life circumstances. I did not grasp the intertwining of his humanity and his divinity in the way I do today.

The more I have studied him and grown in my personal interaction with him in the Spirit, the more I realize the real capacity of Jesus to reach down in to the depths of my heart and to share the most human of my experiences and emotions. Jesus was a humble human being when he came—he experienced the full range of human emotion, and he struggled just as we do with exhaustion, grief, anger, and the limitations of his human body. And he shares all these experiences with us today as he lives in us and with us by his Spirit.

Jesus understood the limits of his human body and human spirit in a way I’m still struggling to. He knew how to care for himself so he would have the capacity to be a fountain of living water for the people he encountered, so the Spirit could flow through him out to others to bring healing, restoration and renewal.

He understood when his limit had been reached, and would take time away to be alone with his Abba so he could be renewed. He knew when he needed to shut out the noise and sleep—even if it was in a boat. And he knew when he needed to replenish his body with food and water.

When we do ministry, or even do life, we forget sometimes we do not need to work so hard we end up exhausted and burnt out. Jesus did not set us that example. He knew his ministry power and direction came from his Abba via the Holy Spirit, and so he protected the time he spent with God. He understood where he drew his strength for fruitful ministry, so he made sure he was abiding in his Abba by the Spirit so his ministry would bear “much fruit”.

He did not consider himself above emotions or emotional expression. Rather, he expressed a full range of emotions. He was honest with his need to grieve the loss of his cousin John the Baptizer, and so took time away from ministry to others, to minister to his own soul. Jesus was not afraid of tears—he didn’t not find them to be “unmanly” for him to express. Instead, he shared in the tears of others, bearing their sorrows with them, and acknowledging his genuine sorrow and grief when it came.

Jesus was just as human as you and me. And yet the early church emphatically insisted he was not just a human being. No, what they experienced, saw, and heard, was decidedly divine. And it was walking around in the same body as the One who was so human. And so they knew they had to find a way to articulate this in such a way that the real humanity and the real divinity of Jesus was protected and preserved. And so we have the creeds today, which are very clear about the nature of Jesus being both God and man, existing in both the same essence as the Father, and the same essence as our created humanity.

It’s hard to get our minds around. But really, it’s a statement to you and to me of the value God places upon our humanity. It was important enough to him to preserve our humanity and to restore it to the glory which was our before the world began. He loved you and me with the same love he has for his unique Son, and shared his blessed Spirit with us so we can experience and realize the reality of that in everyday life.

God is not ashamed of our tears. He created us with the capacity to cry so we are able to share with God in his tears over things which grieve his heart. Maybe Abba doesn’t actually shed tears or cry like a human begin would, but I’ll be Jesus does! He’s still human today, bearing our humanity in the presence of his Abba, interceding for us and restoring and renewing us.

Jesus shares our sorrows and our joys. And he seeks a greater capacity in us for a deep spiritual relationship with God through Jesus in the Spirit so we will be about his business of being on mission, and will begin to bear spiritual fruit. He will not stop working towards that end in you and in me. May his efforts in us and through us be fruitful, while at the same time allowing us to fully rest in his gracious work rather than in our own frantic efforts.

Jesus, I pray we will not be afraid to be truly human, for you did not fear your humanness. May you continue to be with those who struggle with emotional overload, that they may find healing and renewal, and a desire to give themselves room to be real and broken in their humanity, for that is where you meet with them and bind them to yourself in your Spirit. Give us all the capacity to both hear your words of life, but also to live them out in such a way our lives and the lives of those around us are transformed. In your Name, Jesus, we pray. Amen.

“During the days of Jesus’ life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverent submission. Although he was a son, he learned obedience from what he suffered and, once made perfect, he became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him and was designated by God to be high priest in the order of Melchizedek.” Hebrews 5:7–10 NIV